Sunday, October 17, 2010
I just want to follow my dream but no matter what I do, I always fell short.
I was very ambitious and would always find my way to get what I wanted – in school.
But when you step out from that microcosm where everything seemed so easy, in reality the real world thinks like a drunkard. It never really cares. You have to find your own way to survive.
Dreams crumble before my eyes. And it bleeds me to death if it only could.
Cried a thousand buckets but tears still flow profusely like the first time. It still hurts me.
From time to time, I’d still looked at my old files. Thinking how hard I tried but never succeeded. I thought I was good. I used to believe in myself. That’s the reason why I flew in here in the first place – to chase my dreams but to no avail.
That maybe the reason by I always moved from one company to another – from job to job. Because it would never make me happy no matter what how hard I try. My heart always belongs to that dream.
Then I turned 27, 11 companies, and yet my dream is still out of reach.
When will I ever learn? I ask myself.
So now my dream is taking a backseat. I’m now taking my new job (on my 12th company after 3 years from my previous and the longest I’d stayed) seriously because I’d like to save and earn enough so I could chase my dream again.
You might ask, why still chase it when you’re earning enough to satisfy you’re every whim?
What if you’d still fail?
I don’t really know why but if I give up life would be meaningless for me then.
I just wanted to feel how it's like to finally fulfill you're dream even if it's just one time.
Oh boy, just want to share. Don’t mind me really. It’s just lonely here that’s why I’m melancholic right now.
The Curious Cat
P.S. Image courtesy of http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_qan_l-t2BGc/StkxJEVjsLI/AAAAAAAAAec/KRuJfJVNuu0/s1600-h/Migrate_in_Dream_by_liquidkid1.jpg